Thursday, August 25, 2016

My Bodyline Kewpie Cupcakes l547 Horror Story

For my first official, official, post on this blog... I have decided to talk about an outfit I wore for a recent photoshoot, plus adding the story of how I tipped my toes into the lolita pond to test the waters, awhile back. My fashion has improved since this, I promise. 

And yes, before anyone points this out: I know I'm supposed to wear a blouse with a JSK, but honestly, I don't care. It was the beginning of summer and I was dying of a heat stroke at the time so I preferred my own comfort over fashion. Oh no, I did a big no-no. I broke a rule! Yeah you're just going to have to get used to that because I don't really care, I break a whole lot of rules. And also at the time, I didn't know it was SO important to wear a blouse with you're JSK, I was just getting into lolita fashion about a week before I bought this dress, without even realizing that a blouse needed to be a priority, and to this day I still don't own a blouse, I just usually don't wear my JSKs, I prefer my OPs, personally. 
Now, at the time I bought this JSK I was ending sophomore year, and I had just stumbled upon lolita fashion, as well as fairy kei. Before this, my fashion of this sense consisted of pastel goth and that's about it, I thought everything fell under that category. Towards the end of the school year I had extra time on my hands, so I started researching and learning. I used to have this app on my phone called DePop, and I wanted to buy my first lolita dress to try out the style on my own. Now, back then I didn't know about different lolita brands. I didn't know where to shop, what was good and what was bad. I knew that people sold used clothes on DePop, and I knew I was poor (and still am) and couldn't afford $600 for a dress I saw online, and finally I didn't trust buying from ebay. In the end, all I did was search "Lolita" and hoped for the best. 

I continued searching for awhile, everyday, about every hour. I was obsessed for awhile, I have extreme OCD and if I want something, I'm damn sure getting it. I happened to find a seller one day who was selling a handful of bodyline dresses, and some other Liz Lisa dresses. I saved a bunch of money, which a bunch of money to me was $100 and I bought two dresses from her. At the time, I didn't know they were bodyline. I didn't even know what bodyline was. I'll do another post eventually on the other dress when I do a shoot in it, I simply just haven't done that yet for some odd reason. 

Now, to start off my tragic story... I usually wear a medium in american sizes, and I didn't think about japanese sizes, or measurements, or anything. Like I said before, I was a total noob who was just throwing $100 into dresses I hoped fit and I hoped looked good on me. This dress is bodyline's l547 jsk, the Kewpie Cupcake dress. This dress came with the totebag too, which I'll post pictures of below, as well. 

Now, in case you didn't know, jsks run small as well. So I had all factors playing against me. I don't know how to say this nicely, but I have rather large boobs, I wear like a 38C or D, really depending on if I want the bra to be tight or not, which I usually do because let's be honest boobs suck. This particular JSK and I were not friends and still aren't. It's a beautiful dress, don't get me wrong. The details are amazing, it's so cute and perfect but UHG. 

So, here I am. Just got home from the last few days of school, and I see this big box on my porch, I get so excited and I grab it as fast as possible, running upstairs to my bedroom and chucking my school clothes onto the floor before I even got the dresses out of the packages. I was delighted when I saw it, it was my first lolita dress in person. The lace was beautiful, the details had me mesmerized. I've never owned a piece of clothing that costed this much, never anything this fancy. I was happy and I couldn't hide that. I sent pictures to my boyfriend, and posting on facebook bragging of how beautiful these JSK's were. I still hadn't tried them on yet, I was standing naked in my bedroom spazzing about such a perfect specimen. 

Finally, I got the nerve up and I unpackaged both dresses and went to try on the first, the kewpie cupcakes. At first, there was no problem, it fit my hips nicely, and it went over my head. And then reality hits as soon as I go to zip the JSK up. My boobs were in the way! I couldn't zip it up! I took my bra off, and still the zipper refused to budge. I finally decide to grab one of my cosplay binders, aka a sports bra WAY too small to try to force myself into this thing. Nothing worked, there was a few inch gap where I couldn't even get the zipper together!

This JSK does have a lot of shirring, or at least I thought so. I fell onto the floor and starting sobbing. Both jsks were the same size. I just wasted over four weeks worth of work money for two things that I could never wear because they would never fit. I cried and cried. All my time spent hunting felt meaningless and I felt pathetic. Did I gain weight? I must have. I must be too fat now! I know I'm fat, don't get me wrong, but I know I didn't gain weight at the time, and I still fit in my medium tardis dress, so I didn't see the problem!

I ran downstairs to my grandmother after I finally regained my self control. Mascara was running down my face, and I was a shaky anxiety filled mess. I asked her and my little cousin for help, but to avail. I spent countless hours trying to get into that damn JSK. I wasn't giving up until I fit. I told my grandmother that I refused to eat until I could wear it. Truthfully, even loosing weight wouldn't have done much good, my boobs were just too big.  After awhile I kept pulling, loosening the strings, trying my hardest to just fit. Just for one minute, just to make this whole experience worth it. 

After a few hours, I finally fit it, I loosened the sheering as much as it could go, and if I breathed too deeply the dress would unzip, but I did it. And that's what matters. 

Minutes after I rushed to my phone and called my photographer, he happened to be free, thankfully.  I quickly did my hair and my makeup and put together my first shitty lolita outfit ( I'll make a post on the whole outfit later on). I couldn't exactly sit right, but I was wearing it, and honestly that made me the happiest person I could be. We did my shoot, and then I went home and sat in the dress for the rest of the day, as uncomfortable as it was. 

This is how I learned I should buy OPs and I should buy in 2L because you know.... boobs. 

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